


Why We Do What We Do

by zarabithia



Category: DCU (Comics), Nightwing (Comics)
Genre: Community: 7 virtues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-06-18
Updated: 2006-06-18
Packaged: 2019-03-11 04:26:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13516560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zarabithia/pseuds/zarabithia
Summary: Dick’s internal monologue during Outsiders 37.





	Why We Do What We Do

**Author's Note:**

>   Scene in italics represent flashback (which is/was actually canon, btw.)

He’s doing the right thing.  Dick’s certain of it.

Yet, as he stands across from the man he’d idolized as a child, lusted after as a teen, and loved as an adult, Dick can’t shake the memories of the very first conversation he’d ever had with Superman.

He’d been ten and Batman had been busy with another case.  Superman and Robin had made their very own dynamic duo and the world’s greatest superhero had gone out of his way to defer to the ten year old child. Every act, every word, every thought had been so . . . kind.  
_“I was just thinking that it must be nice to have a partner.  Someone who understands why we do what we do.”_  
_“ Yeah. It IS nice.”_

A million other images vie for Dick’s attention  - holding on for dear life as they flew through the sky, Superman giving him a name and a brand new purpose after Bruce had fired him, dozens of head pats and shoulder clasps, the gentleness of Clark’s touch the first time they’d had sex, the disappointment of their break-up - but Dick’s able to forget each and every one of them.

He can’t forget that scene on the rooftop when he was ten.

As his voice rises, Dick remembers the expression that had crossed Clark’s face that night.  It had been one full of promise, respect, and affection. The look on Clark’s face now is one of disappointment, sorrow, and disapproval.   The contradiction only makes the memory of that night from sixteen years ago all the more clear.

Dick searches for anger on Clark’s face and wishes desperately that he could find it.  He wants Clark to be angry, because if he were, then maybe, just maybe Dick could catch a glimpse of the godlike being lording over Earth that Bruce had always warned Dick Superman could turn into. If the cold, calculating, _non-human_   would appear for just a fraction of a second, doing what Dick had to do wouldn’t hurt as much.

That being never appears.  Throughout their disagreement, Clark never stops being the exceptionally kind man who had done everything in his power to make a ten year old kid feel needed.  There’s no anger - even when Dick threatens Clark with the one substance that can kill The Man of Steel.

The threat causes genuine hurt to cross Superman’s face, along with a large dose of betrayal - but not an ounce of anger. 

The Kryptonite does make Clark leave.  Dick is relieved and glad. 

After all, he’d done the right thing.  Dick _knows_ this.  He knows this despite the nausea in his stomach, the tightness in his throat, the shaking in his knees, or the utter futileness of his lungs as he watches Clark fly away.  
__  
_“I was just thinking that it must be nice to have a partner.  Someone who understands why we do what we do.”_  
_“ Yeah. It IS nice.”_

Dick turns around to face the rest of his team.  There are decisions to be made and lives to save.  He’d done the right thing; he’s certain of it.  He just wishes that Clark had understood - that Superman was still capable of understanding why Dick did what he had to do.

He wishes they were still partners.  
****


End file.
